She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
