i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I came so hard my ears popped.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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