So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
