Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
