so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
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The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
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My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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