using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
