he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
