I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Blood and glitter go together right?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize