Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
