This dress was meant to end up on your floor
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
