what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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