so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
