Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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