i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
