this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We need a shit load of segways right now
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize