I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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