too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
