We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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