Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
