i don't like sucking hair
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Randomize
