So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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