He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize