Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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