Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
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