They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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