I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
