im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize