He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
