I'm drive I can fine osifer
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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