But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
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Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
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I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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