I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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