K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
