im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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