Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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