Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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