D3 body, D1 cock
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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