hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
