i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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