All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
God I need to hump something, right now.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize