I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
