her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize