How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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