I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Randomize