Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
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