So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize