You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
