That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
