i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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