Pants 0. Shit 1.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
