i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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