we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
